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snorlaxatives:

methfab:

snorlaxatives:

i want a sugar mama in my life

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not what i had in mind but she will do

wigglytuffer:

first things first i’m

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pvnk-is-dad:

I crave intimacy but I get confused and uncomfortable when I’m shown even the slightest bit of attention or affection.

keyblacles:

how to get a girls panties wet:

  1. kiss her roughly 
  2. shove her down on the bed
  3. slip off her underwear
  4. slam dunk em in the toilet

problematicspice:

profoak:

k999:

shakira is 93 years old and she still looks hotter and plays soccer better than you in a long ass dress,just let that sink in

FIRST OF ALL HOW DARE YOU SAY SHAKIRA IS 93 YEARS OLD

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Saw this card at cvs when I was looking for an engagement card.
themodernlifehasletmedown:

lameteens:

look at her tho she’s actual perfection

i know
if only miley cyrus wasn’t in the way

tupacabra:

when my mom was pregnant she would put a walkman up to her stomach and play cher’s greatest hits and she apologizes for it every day because she thinks that’s what made me gay